Thirty Questions for Married Christian Couples

I. A Successful Marriage Takes Work

1.      What kind of “work” makes a marriage successful?
(cf. Galatians 6:2; Ephesians 4:2) 

2.      Share one thing you have done in your marriage that has contributed to its success.

II. God Makes No Mistakes In Choosing Our Life Partner

3.      Is it possible for a Christian to choose the wrong partner, after satisfying all the parameters of Scripture? (cf. Genesis 24:8,14) What are the implications of each answer?

4.      How can this help in solving marriage problems?

III. A Mate’s Imperfections May Be a Tool For Christian Growth

5.      Can a relationship flourish if both parties are just as strong-willed?
(cf. Amos 3:3)

6.      Why are wives specifically given the injunction to submit to their spouses? (cf. Ephesians 5:22)

7.      How has your marriage made you grow spiritually thus far?

IV. Forgiveness Is Preferred to Permitted Divorce

8.      Are there situations in which it will be difficult or even impossible to forgive?

9.      What can help a Christian to forgive his/her spouse?
(cf. Ephesians 4:32)

V. Problems Should Not Be Exaggerated Nor Ignored

10.  How can one avoid attacking the person rather than the problem?
(cf. 1 Corinthians 1:2)

11.  What are some potential problem areas in marriage that must be handled properly? 

VI. God Allows Us to Enjoy the Company of Those We Love

12.  How can we avoid taking our loved ones for granted?

13.  What are some ways of treasuring our loved ones?
(cf. 1 Peter 3:7; Deuteronomy 24:5)

VII. One Flesh Unity 

14.  What guidelines does the Scripture provide for the physical relationship in marriage? (1 Corinthians 7:3-5)

15.  Does the level of a couple’s physical intimacy in a marriage reflect the quality of their marriage?

VIII. Balancing Between Love and Leadership

16.  Where can we find good role models of love and leadership?
(cf. Titus 2:6,7)

17.  What can fathers do to excel in the management of people in their household rather than just in the management of things? (Philippians 2:3-5)

18.  Why do husbands sometimes complain that they do not understand their wives? (1 Peter 3:7)

IX. Responsible Actions In Leadership

19.  How would the process of planning, deciding, organising, delegating, and supervising be applied in a family? Think of some situations, e.g. going on a family vacation.

20.  Share any useful steps you have discovered that can help to carry out responsible actions in family leadership.

X. How Not To Be a Spectator

21.  What are some common reasons why men become spectators in their marriage?
What can they do to avoid this? (cf. 2 Timothy 1:6,7)

22.  How can wives help their husbands who have become spectators?

XI. Questioning Decisions

23.  What can husbands do to ensure that their decisions will not be questioned after they are made? (Proverbs 11:14; 15:22; 24:6)

24.  How should husbands and wives react to family decisions that turn out to be wrong? (cf. Ecclesiastes 4:9,10)

XII. How Much to Sacrifice for The Family

25.  How should marriage and family considerations affect one’s choice of employment and recreation? (Luke 14:28-30)

26.  What limits should husbands place on the workload they choose to accept in their place of work, that would keep them from neglecting their leadership role at home?

XIII. Communicating Love

27.  What are the ways of communicating love? (1 Corinthians 13:1-7)

28.  Share any difficulties or successes you have had in communicating love to your spouse.

29.  Share some ways in which your spouse successfully communicated love to you.

XIV. Handling Bitterness

30. How does one overcome negative thoughts or feelings about one’s spouse? (cf. Genesis 50:20,21; 1 Peter 4:8)