Forty Questions for Christian Couples Who Are Planning to Marry

Instructions: For each question, look up the passages of scripture provided (if any) and answer them individually, apart from each other, before coming together to share and discuss your answers.

I. The Importance of Marriage

1.      How was marriage instituted?
(Genesis 2:22-24)        

2.      Why was marriage instituted?
(Genesis 1:28; Malachi 2:15; Genesis 2:18; Ecclesiastes 4:9-12; 1 Corinthians 7:2)

3.      What was Jesus’ teaching and attitude about marriage?
(John 2:1,11; Mark 10:6-9).    

II. The Family

4.      How important is marriage and family life to God?
(Cf. Genesis 12:3; 18:19; 1 Timothy 3:2-5)

5.      What kind of family life did Philip have?
(Acts 21:8-10)

6.      When can one have a successful marriage and family life?
(Psalm 127:1; Colossians 3:18-20).     

III. Starting a Christian Family

7.      Seeing the importance of marriage, how should one enter into it?           

8.      What should a Christian woman look for in her choice of a husband?
(1 Samuel 16:7)

9.      What should a Christian man look for in his choice of a wife?
(Proverbs 31:30)         

10.  How can you know if you are compatible for one another?
(Amos 3:3; 2 Corinthians 6:14)

IV. The Husband is the Head of the Home.

11.  What was God’s original intention for the order of authority within the family?
(Genesis 3:16, cf. Genesis 4:7; 1 Corinthians 11:3, Ephesians 5:22-33)

12.  Describe the responsibilities of the head of the home.

V. The Husband is to Love His Wife.

13.  Describe the kind of love that a husband ought to have for his wife.
(Ephesians 5:25,28-29,33; Colossians 3:19)

14.  (1 Peter 3:7a) What does it mean, for a husband to dwell with his wife “according to knowledge”?

15.  How is a husband’s relationship with God affected by the way he treats his wife?

VI. The Wife Is to Submit to Her Husband.

16.  What is the difference in the kinds of submission found in Luke 10:17and Luke 2:51?

17.  What is the nature of the wife’s submission to her husband, according to 1 Peter 3:1,5 and Titus 2:4,5?

18.  What is the meaning of “reverence” in Ephesians 5:33?
(cf. “fear” in Leviticus 19:3, Joshua 4:14)

19.  Describe the kind of spirit a Christian wife should have, according to 1 Peter 3:4 
(cf. Proverbs 19:13; 21:9; 21:19)

VII. Other Relationships

20.  What new relationships does a marriage relationship create?
(Ruth 1:16)

21.  How good do you think your relationship with your spouse’s parents will be?

VIII. Planning for Intimacy in Marriage

22.  How important is the first year of marriage?
(cf. Deuteronomy 24:5)

23.  What is the God’s view of sexual enjoyment in marriage?
(Hebrews 13:4; Proverbs 5:18,19; 1 Corinthians 7:3-5)

24.  What is the Bible’s view of maintaining chastity before marriage?
(cf. 2 Corinthians 11:2)

IX. Planning to Have Children

25.  What are some considerations for deciding on the number of children to have?
(cf. 1 Timothy 5:8; Psalm 127:3-5)

26.  How should one decide on a method of family planning?
(cf. Genesis 9:6; Psalm 139:13,14)

27.  What options can an infertile Christian couple make use of, in order to have children? (cf. Genesis 25:21; Esther 2:7; Genesis 16:1,2,5)

X. Cultivating a Christian Family

28.  What should a Christian Family be like?
(cf. Joshua 24:15; 1 Timothy 3:2-5,12)

29.  From whom should children learn their values in life?
(cf. Deuteronomy 6:6,7)

30.  When should Christian parents start to teach their child the Word of God?
(2 Timothy 3:15; Proverbs 22:6)

31.  How important is it for parents to punish their child when he does wrong?
(cf. Proverbs 23:13,14; Hebrews 12:6-8)

32.  Should Christian parents have their children baptised?
(cf. 1 Corinthians 7:14; Acts 2:39; 16:31-33; Colossians 2:11,12)

XI. Family Finances

33.  What values about material wealth should Christian parents be communicating to their children? (Matthew 6:19-22; 31-33; Mark 4:18,19; 1 Timothy 6:9-10)

34.  What standard of living do you think is reasonable for a Christian family to aspire towards, that will not compromise family values and family life?

35.  What, do you think, is good budgeting? 
(cf. Luke 12:42; Luke 14:28-30; Proverbs 30:25; Psalm 37:21)

36.  How will you plan and decide on expenses?

XII. The Wedding

37.  What are vows?
(Deuteronomy 23:21; Numbers 30:2; Ecclesiastes 5:4)

38.  Do you understand the vows you will be making?

I, (Groom) take thee, (Bride), to my wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do part, according to God's holy ordinance; and thereto I pledge thee my troth.

I, (Bride) take thee, (Groom), to my wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love, cherish, and to obey, till death us do part, according to God's holy ordinance; and thereto I give thee my troth.

XIII. Living Together

39.  How will you maintain good communication lines with one another?
(Philippians 2:1-4)

40.  How will you settle any differences that arise between you?
(James 1:19; Ephesians 4:31,32)