Issue 10 (29 May 2005) 

Perfect Parents Unlimited 

Often we hear parents bemoan the fact that it is increasingly becoming more and more difficult to be parents – let alone attempting to be “perfect parents”. Frequently, we are confronted with issues that we’ve never encountered before.  

Growing up in a rapidly changing society, Anchoring on the unchanging Word of God. 

Our children are growing up in a rapidly changing society. Things around them change so rapidly – the latest toys, the latest storybooks, the latest computer gadgets, hand phones, MP3 players and lots more! The young seemed to embrace changes and it looked as if nothing is permanent anymore – not even the beliefs that they were brought up to believe in, which seemed to be fast fading as becoming “uncool”, old-fashioned and irrelevant to this age and time. 

Perhaps this is the ultimate challenge to Christian parents. Is the Bible still irrelevant? It does not talk about the dangers of Internet nor the 21 Century issues that we now face. Does the Bible still contain relevant advice for parents today? 

What we structure into our lives will certainly drive the outcome we are looking for. What do we spend most of our energy and resources on, for our children? That will give you an idea of the outcome that you want your children to achieve. Will these outcomes see them through the most difficult trials of their lives? 

The Bible contains examples of young children who grew into godly young men and women because they were taught the true and living God, from young. Ever wonder, how Joseph was able to continue to trust in God despite betrayal from his own siblings? How did he remain faithful to God, when again Potiphar’s wife falsely accused him?  

Our children will encounter situations or temptations that truly test their faith. It is natural for them to seek the things of the world   we are associated with sin even in our mother’s womb! “Behold, I was shapen in iniquity; and in sin did my mother conceive me. “ (Psalm 51:5). The wicked are estranged from the womb: they go astray as soon as they be born, speaking lies” (Psalm 58:3).  

Talk to any parent and most will say, parenting was so much easier when the children were younger. Praying with our children regularly, reading the Bible daily, attending Sunday School, worship services, having family worship together …will mean our children are placed in situations where the word of God is preached, the truth shared and the worship of our God is not a ritual but a natural response. 

When was the last time you shared with your children how God answered your prayer? When was the last time your family gathered together and shared with each other the blessings of God?  

Recognising the Source of Actions, Addressing the Source of our Actions 

What if one has faithfully brought the children week after week to church and Sunday school, but the children have now grown up and left the church? Not attending church worship service is really an outward manifestation of something deeper. Where is the source/seat of our decisions? Confronted with a choice to be made, how do our children decide? The heart of the matter lies in the heart. “Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.” Prov. 4:23.  

Isn’t it true that “where your treasure is, there will your heart be also”? If a child chose to lie instead of telling the truth, his deceit reveals the seat of his primary concern – himself. If he eventually grows up and chooses an ungodly partner and leaves the church – it is also clear that where his “treasure is, there will his heart be also”. 

Sometimes as parents we overindulge in our children and we let them do what they want without addressing the issues of the heart. Gen 34:1-5 recounts for us the case of Dinah who was curious about many things. She was Jacob's only daughter, and probably the darling of the family. Someone once said that an over indulged child is rarely the pride and joy nor the happiest. Out of vain curiosity, she ventured out to find out more about the exciting world outside, which exposed her and resulted in tragedy for her and for the family.  

While we can structure in godly influence for him or her, what counts is every individual’s personal relationship with God. As parents, there is no way for us to guard our children twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. When our children learn to put their trust in God, they will also seek to walk in His will. What matters is their personal relationship with God. “My son, give me thine heart, and let thine eyes observe my ways. (Proverbs 23:26). Only God can satisfy the thirst of the heart. Our role as parents is to direct them to this personal relationship with God.   

Is coming together as a family also becoming an increasingly challenging task, as the children grow older?  Do you know with whom they spend most of their time with?   

“My son, if sinners entice thee, consent thou not.” Proverbs 1:10. With whom our children choose for their company will determine the type of fruit they produce and the kind of harvest they reap. We reap what we sow. Is your children drawn to friends who love heavy metal music; who hangs out at game arcades, or is part of a virtual community with whom they have never met face-to-face but wields greater influence over them, than parents whom they see daily but has no hold nor influence? 

Eli had difficulties with his sons - “Now the sons of Eli were sons of Belial; they knew not the LORD” (I Samuel 2: 12) Eli was a priest and we would assume that his children grew up in a family that knows what worship of the Lord means. His children were not first generation believers too. Does it sound familiar for us? For many of us, our children will not be first generation believers either. They probably grew up in our church as well. Yet, we learn from the Bible that God had “told him (Eli) that I will judge his house for ever for the iniquity which he knoweth; because his sons made themselves vile, and he restrained them not. (I Samuel 3:13). Eli’s role as their parent was not forgotten and God held him responsible. Being born in a believer’s family does not guarantee that the child will “automatically” walk in the path of God. Our role as parents to guide, to love and to pray for our children does not change with time.  

Where then can we get the directions for effective upbringing? Where then can we get the latest parenting guide that will address the 21 Century issues on parenting? Where then can we show our children that the shifting values of the world today are like shifting sands that take shape according to the winds of change? Where then can we find unchanging truth, life-changing wisdom? Where else but in the precious Word of God!  

May we continue to seek wisdom from God in our parenting. 

Mrs Shirleen Ong

Sunday School Promotion – Seniors Department 

The Sunday School Senior Department caters to teenagers between 17 to 19. We have a programme that is both academic and practical. The classes are all held at the Beulah House. The ultimate goal is to have the teenagers assured of their salvation and to work out their salvation with fear and trembling. For more details, your can refer to our website at http://www.lifebpc.com/othermin/sssnr.htm. 

Sunday school has always been something I look forward to on Sunday mornings. It has been like a haven of rest for me, allowing me to feel the warmth of Christian brethren and their fellowship. I would feel convicted to share my woes and burdens and listen to those of others too that we may pray and show concern for each other. Sunday school has also taught me countless practical ways for how to cultivate my walk with God. Every lesson taught has been very applicable and constantly helps me to reflect on my spiritual walk each week. I would feel empty if I missed a Sunday school lesson as I would have missed a time of spiritual feeding. The hunger for spiritual food is what brings me back every Sunday morning for Sunday school.

Matt 4:4 "But he answered and said, It is written, Man shall not live by
bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God.

Philip Tan 

I came to Sunday School because I was sleeping over at Samantha's house and she invited me to join her in Church today.  So I came.  It has been a long time since I went to Church.  I plan to come back next week. 

Er Qing (1G2, visitor on 15 May2005)  

“For what is a man profited, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? Or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul?” –Matthew 16:26 

In this world of change, to ensure we spend our time and resources profitably, one must be mature enough to discern what is of eternal value and what isn’t. My previous Sunday School teacher once taught me that only 2 things in this world last forever: the Word of God and people’s souls. This lesson deeply ministered to my heart and Sunday School truly allows us to invest in these areas for I “count all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord” (Philippians 3:8).  

Studying God’s Word at our own pace, with the companionship of spiritual brethren, in God’s House, is indeed a privilege that I constantly thank God for. Through the discussions and sharing by teachers and friends, I am stirred up to live a life that is wholly consecrated to Christ, and fit for the Master’s use. In light of Christ’s soon Coming, may we continue to “be watchful, and strengthen the things that remain” (Revelation 3:2). Amen.  

“He’s fairer than lilies of rarest bloom,

He’s sweeter than honey from out the comb;

He’s all that my hungering spirit needs,

I’d rather have Jesus and let Him lead.”

—Rhea F. Miller (Hymn: I’d rather have Jesus)  

Not I but Christ. 

Going to Sunday School helps me to learn God's Word in greater depth.  Through the discussions we have, I am able to clear doubts and find answers for questions.   As my Sunday School class is small in number and is an all girls class, I find it a very comfortable environment to share about my problems and troubles, be it about school or personal life.  Apart from lessons in class, we have outings when we fellowship with another and share about our many interests.  From these we grew closer to one another and learned to appreciate the bond we have in Christ.  I have learned many application lessons from Sunday School for my daily life.  School life at Junior College is very different from at Secondary School and I am challenged in various situations to make the right choices that will please God. 

MICHELLE (1G2) 

I learn about God's Word in Sunday School and how to apply it to my daily life.  In the past, I never realised that God has always been helping me and guiding me on to the right track.  Sunday School discussions and sharing helped me to recall and recount God's help on many occasions.  I am thankful for the Christian friends at Sunday School who shared and encouraged me with their experiences from similar situations and difficulties. 

Esther (1G2) 

Going to Sunday School is like a breath of fresh air.  I used to think that I was alone in my “battle” for righteousness in school until I started sharing at Sunday School.  Week after week we encouraged each other to press on and not to give up.  I am always reminded to be a good testimony for God and to glorify Him in everything that I do.  Surrounded by like minded sisters in Christ, I felt very encouraged.  I have learned many valuable lessons and progressing from Bible Stories to Bible Study, I feel I have matured spiritually.  At Sunday School I learned the importance of service and was moved to serve in Church with the Kindies.  I also learned to trust God and rely on Him during the period of my 'O' level examinations.  I did not panic and worry each time before I entered the exam room.  I remember feeling a sense of calm especially before my Math exam after having prayed fervently for God's blessing. 

Wei Yan (1G2)

What I enjoy most at Sunday School is the company and the warm ambience.  I feel so welcome and loved.  I like the detail learning of the Bible because I learn to see insights that I never knew before.  I learned about Abram that God asked him to leave everything behind i.e. to leave his past and start afresh with God.  The application I learned from this is to leave the past i.e. to forget whatever hurt or unpleasantness that has happened and move on with my walk with God; to start afresh with Him and not let the past hinder my walk with Him.

Charissa (1G2) 

I came to Sunday School since I was a kid. I come from a Christian family.  My parents brought me to Sunday School since the tender age of 3.  I enjoyed Sunday School and learned many valuable lessons.  I first learned to trust God in Primary 3 at VBS (Vacation Bible School) and accepted the Lord Jesus as my personal Saviour.  I began to grow in the Lord.  However, I became rebellious at Secondary 3 and even began to doubt God.  At Sunday School I am reminded of God's love and I realised that there are many people who care about me.  I really enjoy the lessons at Sunday School.  The many things I have learned from the Book of Genesis since the beginning of this year, fascinates me.  

Samantha (1G2)